Ghosting is the new way of blowing people off.
It drives everybody crazy.
It drives women crazy, it drives men crazy.
You go on a few dates.
If you want maybe two, even three or four dates.
He’s texting you.
He calls you on the phone, which is rare, I know. So, don’t be shocked.
He seems really into you.
Everything seems to be going great. He’s planned out other dates.
And then all of a sudden…
After all of the connecting…
After all of the joking and the great conversation…
One day, you send him a text and you hear crickets. Not a bleep. Not a buzz. Nothing, coming from your phone.
You’ve been ghosted. And you always wonder – because you’re a woman and you need to have all the answers, all the time – why???
It’s just the way your brain works.
You want to know why. You want closure. You want to know if you did something wrong.
How about if I told you it was nothing you did at all?
You did absolutely nothing wrong at all.
It’s not because you talked about your ex-husband.
It’s not because you’re still angry at your boss for that promotion you didn’t get.
It’s not because you’re best friend, well, get’s a little too funky when she drinks.
It’s not one of the words you might have said in the text. Yeah, I know. I know that you overanalyze words in texts.
It’s not because you kissed him too much on date number two.
It’s not because, well, you didn’t go back to his house on date number three. That was a smart move, by the way.
It’s none of that. It really is just what modern dating is all about. It takes a lot more prospects to find the great man.
He might have been intrigued or found someone else.
He might have been dating somebody else at the same time and decided to go with them.
He might have just woken up and decided, well, taking the line from that book back in 2000, he may not be into you.
But, whatever it might be, you’re never going to find out why this guy ghosted. So, when a man ghosts, you need to do exactly what you would do if you saw Casper, the unfriendly ghost, appear in your house.
You close your eyes. You click your heels. And you do what Dorothy did in the Wizard of Oz. You go, “there’s no place like home, there’s no place like home.”
There’s no place like home.
You open your eyes. You look around. And you realize that ghosting is just a part of dating and you need to accept that. You need to accept the fact that men ghost.
You need to accept the fact that men vanish and you need to accept the fact that you’re never going to get an answer for why they ghosted.
I know it drives you nuts.
It drives you crazy not to know the answer. It drives you crazy not to have an explanation. But that’s just part of modern dating. I get ghosted on, as well. I don’t ever get an answer and I just move forward.
Why?
Because my mother taught me the great lesson when I was 18 years old and my girlfriend broke up with me.
She told me that there will be somebody that will love me a lot more. Somebody that wants to be with me. Somebody that wants to be my girlfriend.
So, it’s fine. Somebody ghosts. Well, just take it as a quick “no” and move forward. Because there will be somebody else who doesn’t ghost but you have to keep moving forward.
