“You got to know when to hold them, know when to fold them. Know when to walk away, know when to run.”
-Kenny Rogers.
Do you remember Kenny Rogers… when he had a chicken restaurant?
It was Kenny Roger’s Roosters or Roasters?
Now the man was actually originally known for a song. This is a great lesson for women consistently holding onto losing hands (men) that you should have folded long ago.
You know the guy:
The one who you’ve known for six months and you go out one or two nights a week. You’re ready to commit and make the relationship official, but he’s still sees you as casual. I’m talking about the guy who always has time for his friends, but can’t get to a date on time.
I’m going to break down this song for you. This is going to be your song now. It goes something like this:
On a warm summer’s eve on a train bound for nowhere…
It’s very romantic. How many of you would love to meet somebody on a warm summer’s eve? How many romantic comedies have you seen begin on warm summer nights?
On a train bound for nowhere –
You can think about how interesting the line is alone. Most of our lives seem bound for nowhere. We get through long periods of time where we don’t date anybody or worse, we’re putting ourselves out there and we’re only getting duds back.
You don’t meet anybody great, and then we meet someone.
What most women always say is, “I want to meet someone great.”
Well, what is this someone great like?
So you meet a guy on a train bound for nowhere and the two of your start talking and guess what happens? You find a relationship, but you don’t listen to what he says. Let’s go on to the song.
Almost like when you first meet that guy and he tells you he doesn’t want a relationship.
But if you like him and you think he’s perfect you don’t listen to a word he says. You’re only thinking about the relationship you could be having.
I’m not sure why, but I see women do this all the time. As soon as they meet a man they begin to plan out their entire future. They don’t even know the man on a human level before they have him proposing and picking out a house.
He tells you he’s not ready, but you stop reading his face because you want a relationship.
Then he bummed a cigarette asking for a light
And the night got deathly quiet and his face lost all expression.
He said, “If you’re going to play the game boy, you got to learn to play it right.”
Life is just a game. You got to know when to play it right. He already told you that he doesn’t want to be in a relationship. It’s nothing to do with you, they’re just looking for fun, and you agree to it because you’ve already started developing a future for the two of you.
You bummed a cigarette – you bummed some love from them.
You had asked him for a light and the night got deftly quiet.
Why?
The man got deftly quiet because he didn’t want what you wanted. That’s what men do. They get deathly quiet when a woman isn’t listening.
They can tell and they’re not going to waste their breath trying to convince someone they’re telling the truth.
The man sits there, scratches the back of his head, and thinks, “I just want to get laid. So I’m going to tell her I want a relationship and I’m going to look down at the ground.”
Once again you’re not reading the face being presented to you.
Kenny Rogers gives the best advice now and you need to listen to this:
Know when to fold them,
Know when to walk away, know when to run.
You never count your money when you’re sitting at the table.
There will be time enough for counting when the dealing is done.
You’re six months into a relationship and it’s not going anywhere. What are you holding on to?
Are you afraid of being alone?
Are you afraid this is as good as it’s going to get?
Forget thinking like that. You’re feeling bad for yourself.
If you’ve been reading my articles for a while you should know, there’s a person out there for you and the longer you hold onto the wrong person, the longer you’re denying yourself the right person.
You’ve got to know when to walk away and know when to run. Most of you stay in relationships way too long, when you should be running. When you’re sitting at the table, you’re counting before the dealing is done.
When you’re sitting in a bad relationship, you’re thinking of a future that’s not even there. You’re counting this relationship, as it’s the greatest relationship, and you think you can find a way to make it work, when you never can.
Every gambler knows the secret to surviving is knowing what to throw away and what to keep, because every hand is a winner and every hand is a loser.
Think about this. Every hand is a winner and every hand is a loser. Every man that you date is a winner and a loser. Every single man that you meet is going to show you something if you just pay attention to it.
Every relationship has a lesson.
The problem is, you stay with the losers way too long.
You stay with these relationships even though you know in your heart of hearts you’re going to lose.
Crushed out his cigarette, faded off to sleep
Somewhere in the darkness the gambler he broke even
In his final words I found an ace that I could keep.
Eventually, if you gamble enough in dating, you’re going to find something to keep. You’re going to get that ace. But if you hold the men that are no longer good for you, you’re never going to find the ace. You’re clinging to this bad card because it’s close enough, but it’s not a winner.
Life is just like playing cards. Every day you’re dealt cards. These
cards are options to educate yourself, men hitting on you, potential places to advance your career.
If you’ve got a joker, why would you hold onto it when what you WANT is an ace.
If you’ve got a queen, why would you bother holding onto him because he really likes men.
If you’ve got a six of clubs —
You’re dating a man boy, literally. Why would you date a six year old masquerading as a grown man.
You’re looking for ‘the one’. You’re looking for the ace.
Take a look at your dating life right now. I want you to become more of a gambler. Know when to hold them, know when to fold them, and stop wasting so much time.
You should only be looking for an ace, because you’re time at the table is short. Every day the dealing is done. You’re looking at what you’ve been dealt.
You need to go back out there and get a new deck of cards. Get dealt a new deck of men, and maybe an ace will show up.
