You’ve gone on a couple good dates with a guy. You like him and are excited about the potential you two have, but you’re not actually dating yet. It’s a fun period of a relationship to be in. So much fantasizing about the future, flirting and fun. It’s one of my favorite stages of the dating game! With that all said, it’s also one of the most stressful moments in dating game, too. There’s a lot that can change on a dime, feelings are uncertain and it seems like one little mistake can bring the whole future relationship tumbling down. And that’s why texting feels so high stakes! It’s tough to figure out what’s over texting, what’s under texting, what’s the right thing to send and what’s the wrong thing. Well, let me help you out. Here are some guidelines.
DO: Setting things up
Of course you need to text about setting up plans for the next time you hang out. Keep it straightforward and honest. And be sure to make decisions. No one’s a fan of “I don’t care! Whatever you want!” He wants you to want something!
DON’T: Emotions
At this early stage of the game, texting anything very emotional is a big no-no. He doesn’t know you well enough to put your texts into context and an emotional text could be misconstrued very easily. Keep deep emotional convos to in person.
DO: Inside jokes
A quick one liner that calls back to something funny you two discussed on your early dates is a perfect thing to text about. It’s light and fun and reminds him of what a good time hanging out with you is. For sure do this!
DON’T: Stories
I know you’re used to texting your closest friends every detail of every thing that happens to you and they love your stories. But, avoid that with a new guy. Even the best storytellers in the world should be keeping their early relationship texts to one to two lines. A full play-by-play story is going to seem overwhelming on text. Save it for your next date! It’ll go over better in person.
DO: Thank you
Of course you can follow up a date with a thank you text. It’s a really nice thing to do after you had a great time. A little thank you with a callback to a joke you two made is the perfect between date text to send.
DON’T: Apologies
Avoid apologies at all costs. Even if you think you did something wrong on the date, text is not the place to get into it. You’ll seem sad and self-hating. Instead, either apologize in person or just pretend it didn’t happen. He probably didn’t notice that you went on about your Real Housewives obsession longer than you should have or didn’t share the French fries. If he likes you, little things like that aren’t going to matter and you don’t need to apologize, in text or otherwise.
Good luck, ladies. Text safely!
