Tag Archives: dating tips
A follow-up to The NYT Article – “To Fall In Love With Anyone Do This” and how you can get in on the action!
There is no question that love is a tricky thing. There are hundreds of ways to dance around every issue that arises, and so many “rules” to contend with. Rules about when to call someone, how long to wait until you sleep together… the list goes on and on!
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I know, I know…some of you are rolling your eyes at the title of my blog. Seriously, what can The Bachelor teach us about love? When the first season aired in 2002, I too thought, What are these women thinking? Where’s their self-respect? But when I watched this season’s episodes, I had a different take on the show. It’s not because it’s any different now than 13 years ago, but because I’m different. In 2002 I was still in college. Now, I’m a dating and relationship coach who has spent the last several years specializing in love and researching what makes relationships work. It’s been my job to help my clients figure out why they act like they do when it comes to love. Are people truly crazy and irrational, or can behaviors actually make sense? In the context of love and our need to connect with a person, the bachelorettes’ behaviors seem pretty reasonable. Here are 4 lessons from The Bachelor that can be applied to your love life:
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I hear it from every single one of my single friends. “Dating is a complete waste of time.” And I get what you’re saying. After all, I’ve spent my fair share of time single. But, it really doesn’t have to be. You can weed out the losers and freaks and duds way before you even get to that first date with a few simple tips. I’m not saying that I have a magic formula to guarantee every first date turns into true love. No one, not even the best matchmakers in the world, can do that. But, I do know how to tell if someone is boyfriend material before the first date. Here’s how.
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“Variety's the very spice of life, that gives it all it's flavour.”― William Cowper
When it comes planning a perfect night out, I am often asked how I choose the best restaurant for a successful date night.
Naturally, there are a couple key things that should come into consideration when choosing the ideal dinner location. Things like the food preferences of your guest and ambiance should always be first on your list! I repeat, FIRST!
Although these are very simple things to remember, I have been very surprised when I hear about many “first date nightmares.”
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Lately I’ve been hearing more of this from my single friends: “why is he saying this but doing that?” and “how soon is too soon for X, Y, or Z?” and beating themselves up over things that were said, or not said.
Now, I like to think of my self as a Champion Dater of sorts and because of this, I’ve found my friends (and sometimes strangers) considering me their go-to girl for all things dating. This, of course, in addition to my often-unsolicited advice.
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Please tell me you were as obsessed about the blue and black/white and gold dress phenomenon as I was. I mean, of course you were. You’re a human with internet connection. That one little dress set the internet ablaze. Some people took a look at the picture and saw a blue and black dress. Others saw a white and gold dress. It turns out, that it’s all about color theory and the way our brains perceive things and color isn’t real and blah bliggity blah. Whatever. The bottom is line is the people can look at the same image and see completely differently things. It happened with this dress picture in a very pointed way, but it happens in a million different ways in real life. And when you’re in a relationship with someone and he sees a situation differently than you do, it can be a real challenge. Here’s what to do.
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