Men are just as guilty as women when it comes to making fashion faux pas. In fact, I would say they’re more frequent fashion offenders than we are, which is why I feel it is my duty to outline all of the trends men wear that women hate. You’ll thank me later, guys, I promise.
1. Man Jewelry
The only acceptable pieces of man jewelry are a watch and a wedding ring. End of story. Everything else is highly questionable and will be judged to the highest degree. Necklace? Nope. Earrings? Not likely. Bracelets? Negative. Just leave the jewelry to us women, okay?
2. Cargo anything
Who is still making cargo pants/shorts and how can I make them stop? I know for a fact that you guys don’t carry anything more than your wallet and keys, so lets stop pretending you need a million pockets. Even if the pockets were being put to good use, they still are placed in the oddest areas. Like why do you need to carry things by your knee? I hate cargo anything so much that I would prefer a guy to carry a man purse if he has that much stuff to carry. Yeah, I said it, a man purse.
3. Flat caps
Are you Irish? Are you in the band Dropkick Murphys? If the answers to both of these questions are no, then you shouldn’t be wearing a flat cap. It sends the same signal to women that a bun or ponytail sends to men: you were too lazy to do your hair. But really, how long does it take you guys to do your hair anyways? 10 minutes, tops? Grab some hair product, run a comb through it and call it a day. Leave the flat caps in Ireland and in Dropkick Murphy’s green room.
4. Wrong sized clothing
This rule applies to both men and women, but I feel like men do this more frequently. Wearing something that doesn’t fit never EVER makes you look good. Buying a smaller size shirt doesn’t magically make your beer belly smaller. Buying a larger size shirt doesn’t magically eliminate your man boobs. Buying a size too small or too big will make you look heavier than you actually are. Buying a size that actually fits, no matter if it’s a small or large, will make you look slimmer, guaranteed. Men, let me let you in on this secret us women have known for years: a tailor is your best friend.
Guys, when it comes to fashion, just keep it simple. Next time you go shopping, make a date out of it and invite your lady. Not only will she be impressed that you want to go shopping, but she’ll also feel appreciated when you ask for her opinion on outfits.
