Category Archives: Relationships
You’ve probably heard people say that half of all marriages end in divorce. And if you look at the tabloids and read about celebrity marriages, it seems like it’s even more than that. It's actually far less, but divorce is prevalent. After walking to the altar and making a life-long commitment to each other, what’s splitting so many people apart? Every marriage and every divorce is different, of course, but I’m guessing that most of the splits have to do with some of these factors.
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Abusive relationships are twisted and complicated. From the outside, it seems obvious. This woman is getting hurt, so of course she should leave. But on the inside of the relationship, the issue is far more involved. The woman is dependent on the man, if not financially, then certainly emotionally. Often there are children involved and lots of shame. Closing the door on relationships like this is so much harder than it sounds. If you’re in an abusive relationship, I urge you to seek professional help. Resources like the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1−800−799−SAFE(7233) can give you the tools and help build the strength you need to leave a situation.
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I get to be a part of a lot of successful romances, hear a lot of gushing about first kisses and dance my face off at a lot of weddings. Unfortunately, it also means I hear a lot about the less swoony parts of relationships, like cheating. Cheating happens. And it happens to a lot of good people. I was recently asked, “My boyfriend, who’s been amazing to me, just admitted that he’s cheated before. I always believed ‘Once a cheater, always a cheater,’ but I can’t imagine breaking up with him for something he did to another woman. Am I being an idiot?”
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Ah, the age-old story. Boy meets girl. Boy falls in love with girl. Boy cheats on girl. Or maybe girl cheats on boy. Either way, cheating is a fact. A lot of people do it, and a lot of people get caught. I get this question a lot: "Is it ever okay to take back a cheater?" Like most frequent relationship questions, the answer isn't a simple yes or no. If it were, you wouldn't need dating experts. My usual answer is, “Yes, there are times it’s okay to take back a cheater, but you need to answer some questions yourself.” Here are those questions:
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Death, taxes and PDA. Yep, I include public displays of affection as one of the few constants in life. As long as people are in love and you’re not living in hiding, there’s going to be some public loving. PDA can be totally acceptable. Adorable, even. But it’s a slippery slope that can also be icky and completely inappropriate. Here’s a quick rundown of the yeses and nos.
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I just finished reading Rebooting in Beverly Hills by Marcy Miller. 40 plus singles, get a copy now! I mean that. It's a funny and honest look at dating later in life, something I can surely relate to. Reading the book got me thinking about how love is like a big game of hide and seek. But in this dating version of hide and seek, it can feel like you’re doing all of the seeking and no one's ever seeking you.
Not to spoil the ending, but Marcy found love in her quest and very rarely got discouraged, even when it seemed like she was playing that unfair version of hide and seek. Her attitude toward dating impressed me so much, I thought I'd throw together a Rebooting in Beverly Hills-inspired list of ways to find love when it feels like it's not looking for you.
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