Category Archives: Relationships
Reader Usual Problem writes:
Hi, I've been following your "Functional Couple Friday" articles (I'm always curious to find out what other couples do to maintain their relationships) and I've noticed that a lot of the couples who seem the happiest, have similar levels of sex drive. This is not the case with me (32) and my partner (23) of two years.
When we met we were instantly drawn and attracted to each other. In the beginning we had sex at least 4 times a week, often more. As we settled in to the relationship, my sexual appetite became less. My mood is easily affected by external factors, such as financial issues, health issues, and small annoyances. I get the strong sense that he is convinced that my sex drive is below average. I know it's important for (many) women to invest time and effort into sexual activity and I'm trying to do that but I also often feel quite pressured. I know if it was up to him, we'd be having sex every day and somehow that knowledge is always in the back of my mind, pressuring me.
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What is a 30-day time bomb?
A 30 day time bomb is when we create powerful stories based on our needs, wants, and desires. Then we turn the person we're dating into exactly what we think we want, need and desire. We're not seeing is the real person in front of us.
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The days of actual phone calls and men showing up at the door on a whim are so far gone, they might as well be back in the stone age. Past generations had no idea how lucky they were to have these as standard forms of communication when dating. They struggled with deciphering mixed messages based on actual conversations, voice-to-voice and face-to-face. I never thought I would be envious of a generation’s lack of technology, but texting and dating have proved otherwise.
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Have you ever had – what you considered – a great date, and then you never heard from the guy again? Then you start thinking about everything that you said, how you “blew it,” what you did to scare him away and so on. You may even reach out to your friends, divulging every detail of your date to see if they could pinpoint where you went wrong?
Stop it.
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Fall is a wonderful time to be in love. Really though, when isn’t? But, I particularly love fall romance because there’s this ticking clock on the good weather. You feel like you have to do every possible outdoor activities one last time before Old Man Winter really sets in. Here are my favorite fall dates that I think you need to do with your man before fall is over.
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