Here’s a question for you all today. How many times in your life have you been in love, and I mean seriously in love?
Right now some of you will be saying, “Well, maybe once or twice.” Others will be saying, “Wow, probably five or six times.” And others will be saying, “I honestly don’t know if I’ve ever truly been in love.”
It’s interesting, and it’s something I run into a lot during my coaching. Very few people can genuinely tell the difference between love and infatuation. You meet a new guy. He’s amazing in every way you can imagine. He makes you feel like the most desired woman in the world, and he treats you like a queen. The sex you have is off the charts, and he’s the first thing you think about when you wake up, and the last thing you think about at night.
Surely, that must be love, right?
Well, not necessarily. We’ve talked about the effects of oxytocin before, (the love drug) and how it’s very easy to get carried away with all those happy chemicals that run through your body when you’re in that magical honeymoon phase of a relationship. But when the novelty wears off, what are you actually left with? Have you honestly connected with the guy? What do you have in common? Can you imagine yourself with him 20 years down the line?
You’re so eager for things to work out; you create this whole fantasy in your mind about how the relationship is going to go.
You see what most women do is fall in love with the whole Disney fantasy they have going on. You meet this guy who seems so perfect. You’re so eager for things to work out; you create this whole fantasy in your mind about how the relationship is going to go. He’s going to be loyal, he’ll always be as passionate about you as he is now, he’ll always treat you like a queen, and you’ll always be happy by his side. You forward pace so far into the future, you’re already thinking about how you’re going to have joint burial plots together so your 18 children can come and visit Mom and Dad together.
You’re falling in love with a fantasy relationship, and not the actual guy you’re dating. It’s an easy trap to fall into, and one you need to avoid at all costs. In the video below, I’ll reveal the subtle difference between love and infatuation, and remind you why it’s so important to keep your emotions in check no matter how amazing your new man seems. Mistaking infatuation for love is the quickest way to set yourself up for heartache!
For more dating advice for women head to David’s website.
