Hi Emily,
After listening to your show regularly, I decided that it’s time for me to find my G-spot! Based on your suggestions, I have been trying to pay attention to my body during sex, and I noticed that the spot that feels really good each time my boyfriend thrusts in and out is actually located on the BACK wall of my vagina. I know you always say that the G-spot is located on the FRONT wall, so what am I feeling? Could my G-spot be in the wrong (or a different) place?
Thanks,
Loyal Listener Lauren
Dear Lauren,
I love that I have inspired you to go deep! I am definitely happy to help you get to the bottom of this, so you can get the most bang for your buck.
A number of things could be going on back there, Lauren. What I can tell you for sure is that your G-spot did not migrate and your body isn’t backwards. But before we get into what you need to do to make the magic happen, let me help demystify the caverns of your lady parts.
The inside of your vagina actually has a number of erogenous zones that, when stimulated, can elicit a pleasurable response. First, there’s the “A-spot,” which is located on the front vaginal wall behind belly button. The “O-spot”—which might be the spot you’re hitting—is a spongy tissue on the back wall of vagina. There are also cervical orgasms, which happen when the penis (or a well-placed device) reaches so deep that it hits your cervix. Women are so blessed in the pleasure department, because there are a wide range of incredible orgasms to experience, and they all feel a little different. But for now, let’s focus on your G-spot.
Contrary to what most women think, vaginal intercourse is not the easiest way to uncover the mystery of the G. Think of it like a tiny little boutique located on a bustling shopping street—You could pass by it every single day and never know it’s there, unless you know what you’re looking for.
So before you start playing around with different sex positions, I think you should begin this journey exploring solo. That way, you can do a little recon, learn the lay of the land, then come back and report your findings to your eager-to-please partner.
To help guide you, here’s a little tutorial.
WHERE IS IT?
The G-spot is located about 2 inches inside the vagina, perched on the front vaginal wall. Although size and location may vary from vagina to vagina, you will know the G-spot by its ridged texture (similar to that of a walnut).
When a woman becomes aroused, this lump of tissue swells and becomes more sensitive to the touch. That’s why I recommend treating yourself to a clitoral orgasm (or three) before you start your search; when you have an orgasm, blood rushes to the genitals, making the G-spot even easier to find.
HOW DO I FIND IT?
The best way to locate the G-spot is by exploring the area with your fingers. Start with your palm facing up, then curl your fingers up and gently stroke the top of the vaginal wall. When you find the slightly ridged area, you might gasp a little or react with surprise. That means you’re on the right track!
Once you’ve located the area, try stroking it with your index and middle finger using a come-hither motion. Play around with different amounts of pressure until you find what works, then stick with it!
HOW LONG WILL IT TAKE?
A G-spot orgasm usually requires continuous stimulation, so it might not happen right away. The trick is to provide consistent pressure and stimulation as your arousal builds. If you start to feel like you have to pee, that means it’s probably working, so keep it up! Just keep stroking in a steady rhythm and keep in mind that great things (and great orgasms) usually take time.
For some women, having a G-spot orgasm is made a lot easier when you bring clitoral stimulation into the mix—often times, combining an unfamiliar sensation (internal stimulation) with a familiar one (external vibrations) can help to relax your body and distract your mind from those pesky questions… You know the ones: Is it working? Am I feeling anything? Is this what’s supposed to happen?
If you find that your fingers just aren’t dextrous enough to give your G-spot and clitoris the consistent stimulation that they need, you can always bring a sex toy into play. And, few toys do dual stimulation better that the new wearable SYNC by We-Vibe! Its patented and adjustable C-shape curves to fit your body and remains in place, providing direct, continuous vibration across all your hottest spots. The result: double the pleasure and double the chances of experiencing a pretty powerful orgasm.
The SYNC can also be worn DURING sex, letting you control the vibrations through an app on your smartphone, enhancing the pleasure for both you and your partner!
While everybody is unique, our anatomy more or less remains the same. With a commitment to deep exploration—whether solo or with a pal—there’s always something new to discover. The good news is, you’re on your way to mastering one of your major pleasure spots; now you just have to practice, practice, practice until you find them all!
Xxx
Emily
Want more Sex With Emily? Check out my podcasts for free on iTunes.
For the perfect combination of style, sophistication and kink, check Sportsheets’ new Midnight collection. Use code EMILY at checkout… Whip those pelvic floor muscles into shape for stronger orgasms with my Kegel Camp app. Ready for a couple new additions to your goodie drawer? Use code EMILY for 15% off at Good Vibrations where you can find all my favorite toys in my store. Enhance your oral sex experience and become the dessert with JO’s flavored Gelato lubricants…
Have a question about this post? Email feedback@sexwithemily.com.
