Do you have an ambitious man? Ambition is a tricky thing. Too much of it can make someone not only difficult to partner with romantically, but difficult to be around in general. And too little of it, well, can do the same exact thing. You need the perfect Goldilocks amount of ambition for a person to feel right. When you’re first dating something, it’s easy to ignore the ambition quotient. You’re getting charmed by their humor, dazzled by their looks and swept up in the romance of new love. Ambition probably isn’t on your mind when your knees are melting over that first kiss. And that’s fair enough. But, once the initial honeymoon period has worn off and the sparkly love dust has settled, you might noticed that your mister is a bit lacking when it comes to ambition. And that’s just plain unattractive. Before you panic, here’s what you should do.
Figure it out – Ambitious man
Talk to him about it. I’m a huge believer in direct communication, but this might be a scenario where you don’t have to be dead on direct. Ask your guy about his goals and dig a little deeper into his life plans without flat out saying, “I think you’re a bum. A handsome bum. But a bum!” Maybe he’s slacking in his job because his dream is to be a chef. So, he spends his energy cooking at night. Or you could not fully understand his job and a little more detail can help you appreciate just how hard he is working and where he’s hoping it will lead. Your guy could also be totally right on and he might not be tenacious or have big dreams. But, you’re not going to do until you do a bit more research.
Assess your non-negotiables – Ambitious man
You all know that I believe you can have five non-negotiables when it comes to finding a romantic partner. But, that’s it. Your list can’t be a mile long if you want someone real and not a magical unicorn ninja prince of a man. So, think back on your list of non-negotiables. Is ambition on there? Is there a certain amount of money or financial stability you need in your life to feel comfortable. What about upward mobility? What kind of wagon do you want to hook your cart to? Or is it cart to wagon? I don’t know! I was never that good at The Oregon Trail. Regardless, life can be very happy with a guy who’s not ambitious if he’s fulfilling all of your other needs. Or, it can pure torture if ambition is one of your major needs. Figure out what ambition means to you.
Stay or go – Ambitious man
You have to make a decision that’s right for you and stick with it. If you decide to leave him, know that you did the right thing for yourself and don’t look back. If you decide to stay, ditto. Don’t look back. You can’t constantly reconsider his levels of ambition and wish they were higher. You picked your lane, now stay in it. If you feel like you’re wrestling with yourself daily about dating a guy without enough ambition after you decided to stay, you actually didn’t decide to stay. You just put off the decision to move on. Keep that in mind!
Know that your perfect man with the perfect level of ambition is out there. You might already be with him or you could need to find him! No matter what your situation is, I wish you lots of luck.
