Unless you’re still dating your high school sweetheart, the dude you’re dating has a romantic history that doesn’t involve you. And even if he is your high school sweetheart, there could be some history there too. Middle school can get pretty steamy, if I remember correctly! (I have a boatload of spin the bottle stories.) Anyway, the question here is what should you do if your ex’s romantic past feels like it’s haunting you. And I have the answer.
Figure Out What’s Haunting You
An ex’s past can haunt you in many ways. His ex-girlfriend could still be in the picture. You could hear rumors of his previous bad boy ways. He could reference old conquests. Or, you could stumble into his romantic past via old pictures on Facebook. So, pinpoint how his past is finding its way into your present. If it’s something you’re doing actively, like Facebook stalking him, the solution is simple. Just stop, girl! If it’s him who’s doing it, just talk to him and let him know how it makes you feel. Once you figure out exactly what’s itching you, it’ll be much easier to scratch.
Talk To Him About It
I feel like “talk about it” is a bullet point in every, single one of my posts. But communication is key to a successful relationship. And this issue is no different. Talk to your guy about how you’re feeling. Let him know exactly what’s bugging you. Don’t hold back at all. Honesty is going to make all the difference here. See what his reaction is. He should be able to make you feel confident enough in your current relationship that his past shouldn’t matter at all. If he’s not concerned with how you feel about his past, then that could be a red flag that he’s just not that into your feelings. Which means he’s a real jerk! And who needs a real jerk with a sketchy past in their life? Not you, sister! That’s for sure.
Accept It Or Don’t
Once you’ve thought about it and spoken to your guy, you have two choices…you can either accept his past or not. His past is always going to be a part of him. And it’s what made him who he is today. So, even if his dating track record isn’t the cleanest or shortest record out there, it’s his and he’s yours. You can either take that for what it is or you can leave it. But, do yourself a favor, and don’t dwell on this for too long. It’s not something he can change, no matter how much you discuss it or fight about it. Try to focus on how you feel about who he is and how he acts in relationships now. But, if his past isn’t something you can get over, then you need to get over him. Harsh, but true. Very, very true.
Hope that helps any lady out there dealing with a dude who has a less than perfect romantic past! Until next time, my loves!
