Getting into a new relationship is basically like doing a big old trust fall into the arms of a stranger. You know what I mean? Relationships, even at the very beginning, are all about trust and when you’re just getting to know a dude, it can be tough to tell if he’s trustworthy or not. Here are some ways to figure out if he’s being two-faced or if the face you’re starting to fall for is the only one he has.
Cell phone usage
Is your man not really in touch with you when you’re apart? And is he on his cell all the time when you’re together? While neither of these is actually damning evidence, I don’t trust a guy who’s not in touch enough or a man who’s chronically on his phone when he has a beautiful woman sitting in front of him. I think when you’re apart, good guys are in touch enough to let you know they’re thinking about you and when you’re together, are off their phones enough to let you know they’re thinking about you too. I’m sure there are exceptions to this rule, but I don’t want to date them. And you shouldn’t either.
Friend intros
If you’ve been dating him for a while, like three months, and you haven’t met anyone else in his life, something’s up. By that point, he should be talking about you so much to his friends that they’re knocking down his front door to meet you. If they’re not, that means that he hasn’t be talking about you and there’s probably a reason for that. Spoiler alert: The reason’s not going to be good.
Details
Does it seem like your guy has the worst memory on the planet? For example, on your second date, does he seem to misremember everything from your first, including details about his own life? Again, not necessarily a bad thing. I’m sure there are some good guys out there with very limited short term memory, like that guy from Memento was pretty hot, but come on. It probably means that he’s dating a lot, which is fine if you’re not exclusive. It also means that he isn’t valuing or reflecting on the time he spent with you because you’re just one in a long line, which is not fine at all.
Too perfect
I don’t know about you, but my perfect guy isn’t, well, perfect. I want a man who’s a human. And humans make mistakes. If your guy is just a little too perfect, a little too charming, a little too good at dating, something else could be going on. Of course I’m not saying that you should doubt every guy who holds a door open for you, but I am saying that there’s no such thing as perfect. So, be wary if your guy is.
Your doubts
If you clicked on this post because you have doubts about your man, then I say something’s icky about him. Never doubt your gut, it’s very rarely wrong. (Except for that one time mine told me it was hungry for sushi in Mexico. So wrong to eat that sushi!) A woman’s intuition is one of her best tools, so trust yours. If you think something’s off, it probably is.
Have you ever been surprised that someone you trusted in a relationship turned out to be a total jerk? Tell me about it in the comments below.
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