Remember when online dating was something people did behind closed doors? It wasn’t so long ago that dating online was seen as taboo. People feared the dreaded criticism of seeming desperate or dare I say pathetic. For the most part, those days are gone. Today if you’re single, chances are that you’ve been Tindering on your lunch break along with your friends.
Sure, there’s a small amount of hits and a lot of misses but what have you got to lose? Even supposed “hook up” apps brings two people together into a successful pairing. So, how do you make the most of what the online dating world has to offer? Besides the obvious safety suggestions, here are my three top tips for success:
1. Drop Your Expectations
Do you think you’re about to meet a motorcycle riding, charming, business savvy, handsome man that oozes puppies out of his perfectly molded hair? Guys, do you think the woman you’re going to meet just stepped out of Sports Illustrated, has the personality you’ve always dreamed of, and has the cooking skills of Julia Child? Time to drop your expectations before your date or else you’re asking for failure. Don’t build the expectation of the perfect man or woman before you meet up with your prospect. Until you meet in person, you have no idea how you’ll connect with someone new, so don’t shoot yourself in the foot with unrealistic expectations
2. Don’t Talk For Too Long
So many people go on dates after spending weeks, even months chatting with someone online. This is a sure-fire way to build up false expectations (see tip number one). The most successful dates typically occur after messaging with someone online for less than a week. Don’t waste your time exchanging messages with someone for too long. What if there’s no chemistry and the only thing going for them was their punctuation?
3. Practice Makes Perfect
The great thing about dating online is that it actually helps you learn how to date. It’s perfect if you’ve been out of the dating game or if you’re feeling shy or insecure about meeting someone new. Instead of putting all your eggs in one basket, go on multiple dates and meet a variety of people. This way you’ll become more comfortable with dating and get a much clearer picture of what you’re looking for in a partner. I’m not recommending that you sleep with a bunch of people, just experience what it’s like to meet a diverse pool of prospects.
Dating teaches you a lot about yourself as well. You will quickly learn what you want and you won’t waste your time with the wrong people anymore. Finally, dating is supposed to be fun, so don’t forget to enjoy yourself and the journey.
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